Hello again.
Last
week I introduced you to the Body Positive model and Body PositivePsychology. A quick recap: The Body
Positivity approach has five core components:
●
Reclaim Health
●
Practice Intuitive Self-Care
●
Cultivate Self-Love
●
Declare Your Own Authentic Beauty
●
Create Community
Practicing these components lead to increased self-love,
self-acceptance, better relationships, better choices and better health. Last week I talked about Reclaiming Your Health. This
week I'll go over the second competency, Practicing Intuitive Self Care.
In order to Practice Intuitive Self-Care you
need to learn to listen to and follow your body's wisdom. I'm finding with myself and almost all of my
clients (whether they're seeing me for Body Positive work or not) that we have
forgotten how to listen to ourselves. As
babies we innately knew when we were hungry and when we weren't. We ate if we were, and when we weren't we refused
to open our mouths or spit our food out when we were being fed.
As we grew we heard things like "this is
when I'm serving dinner, if you want dinner you better eat now" or
"we don't waste food in this house." Maybe you grew up in a big family and if you didn't eat everything you
could as fast as you could, your siblings would beat you to it and there
wouldn't be enough left for you.
Everybody has their own story and these stories have formed us into the
kind of eaters we've become.
It's time
to become introspective. Ask yourself
how you feel and what your body needs and listen closely. You'll hear the right answers! If you need help with this, find a counselor
who can help you get back in touch with your inner voice.
We all have the
wisdom necessary to create and sustain self-care behaviors that provide
nourishment, fitness, and pleasure. When you listen to, and act on this wisdom
you innately possess to meet your body's’ specific needs and desires for
certain foods, types of movement, and rest, you are practicing self-care!
“The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the
past,
worry about the future, or anticipate troubles,
but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly.”
The Buddha
Slow down, get quiet for a moment and ask yourself "Am
I hungry? What is my body craving? Do I feel like I need protein? I'm craving a
banana. I must need
potassium." or "I'm feeling
restless. I must need to move this body. What would I enjoy doing, a walk or a bike
ride?"
Your body is wise, and it knows what you need. Do you feel like you need something sweet? As if nothing else will satisfy you? Then
allow yourself to have that leftover piece of cake but pay attention to your
body when it says you've had enough. One
of my favorite tenants of the Health at Every Size® (HAES) model, a practical
and research-based health model that honors the genetic diversity of human size
and shape, is that no food is off limits!
I have tried everything from being a vegetarian for two years to
following Paleo for three years. This and every other weight loss plan is based
on restriction. Here is a fact, we want
what we forbid ourselves to have. It's true that we get over cravings after we
detox, but unless you are one of those rare breeds that actually doesn't like
sweets, living a life of never being able to have something that you enjoy
leads to frustration, unhappiness, and cheating.
And of course, cheating leads us to being disappointed in ourselves,
self-hate, and bingeing. It's a vicious
cycle.
“If [diets] really worked, we’d be running out of dieters.”
Glenn Gaesser, PhD,
author of Big Fat Lies: The Truth about Your Weight and Your Health
When nothing is off limits you allow yourself to experience
everything you enjoy with control. You
don't need to eat half the cake thinking that you can't allow yourself this
treat again. Perhaps you will eat the
whole piece. Perhaps after a couple of
bites you'll feel that you've had enough because you know that if you feel that
you must have this again, you
can!
As you get better and better at
listening to your body and acting on its needs you will find that you can
experience everything you enjoy and maintain and even lose weight! You will learn you can trust what you know in
your gut (pun may be intended). This new way of thinking will be an enormous
relief, being free of the depletion and
confusion that result from trying to respond to all of the conflicting messages
that come from others.
When you're able to figure out what you need in regards
to food, movement and rest on your own, you'll find yourself gaining self-esteem
and confidence naturally. Speaking from
my own experience, you will feel more content, peaceful and happy and you will
enjoy what you are doing and eating on a whole new level.
Stay tuned, next week I'll be talking about Developing a
Practice of Self-Love. In the meantime
if you'd like to skip ahead, check out
Embody: Learning to Love Your Unique Body (and Quiet that Critical Voice) by Connie Sobczak and Elizabeth Scott (I am not an affiliate
and profit in no way by your purchase of this book).
Don't forget to be kind to yourself. It shows others how you expect to be treated.
Peace Out,
Photo: Ashley Jonathan Clements, Linh Nguyen
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